Only in Pittsburgh can a guy walk into a bank and come out a folk hero.
Yes, you’re disturbing me, but I’m counting my bank earnings so everything bothers me. I don’t even think I have a receipt for the bitcoins I stole.
You guessed it, working in the steel mills is stupid. Robbing banks in full clown get-up is easy money. I’m not caught, not yet. Why don’t you introduce yourself then? You know me, I’m the Clown. Yeah, I’m way too common in a city of this size.
What did you think, the politicians would talk me to death? Or the cops would stop eating a donut long enough to chase me into the Consol Energy Center on a Friday evening? Get real. I own this town just like I own Ariel. She’s lived with me for ten years and that means something. When her daddy left her, I knew how it felt. My old man packed up the car and left us too.
Why the clown suit? You think I’m a fool? How many hours do you put into that job of yours? I pocketed nine million, tax free. That’s why the politicians are mad, I’m walking around and they didn’t even make their cut.
Don’t get cocky? Well, if I don’t get caught maybe some of the copycats will; either way, I’m not going to make it easy on this city. So, folk hero or not, I got a story to tell and if I need a little satire to tell it, it will do. I might be rated R, but this tale is a PG-13.
I love crime dramas, don’t you? Ariel will try to make it into a romance, but I’m the interesting one, and don’t you forget it.
Yes, you’re disturbing me, but I’m counting my bank earnings so everything bothers me. I don’t even think I have a receipt for the bitcoins I stole.
You guessed it, working in the steel mills is stupid. Robbing banks in full clown get-up is easy money. I’m not caught, not yet. Why don’t you introduce yourself then? You know me, I’m the Clown. Yeah, I’m way too common in a city of this size.
What did you think, the politicians would talk me to death? Or the cops would stop eating a donut long enough to chase me into the Consol Energy Center on a Friday evening? Get real. I own this town just like I own Ariel. She’s lived with me for ten years and that means something. When her daddy left her, I knew how it felt. My old man packed up the car and left us too.
Why the clown suit? You think I’m a fool? How many hours do you put into that job of yours? I pocketed nine million, tax free. That’s why the politicians are mad, I’m walking around and they didn’t even make their cut.
Don’t get cocky? Well, if I don’t get caught maybe some of the copycats will; either way, I’m not going to make it easy on this city. So, folk hero or not, I got a story to tell and if I need a little satire to tell it, it will do. I might be rated R, but this tale is a PG-13.
I love crime dramas, don’t you? Ariel will try to make it into a romance, but I’m the interesting one, and don’t you forget it.
